It's a a cliche, right? Men won't ask for directions. We've probably experienced it as kids and exhibited it as adults and, as a result, spent countless hours wondering around muttering "it must be here somewhere". But why do we men do this? According to a study by Duke University School of Business it's driven by fear, the fear that asking for help challenges our manliness. We believe we''ll be seen as less competent and a poor leader their study claims. Interestingly the study shows it's the complete opposite for women, who are expected to ask for help as it fits society's view of the female role. So what we have is gender stereotyping driving stereotypical behaviour, thus reinforcing the stereotype further. Another study for UK insurer 'Sheilas' Wheels' found that male drivers clock up an average of 276 miles of unnecessary driving every year because we won't ask for help until we become totally desperate. Now think about this from the perspective of a new father. Your journey ahead is full of unknowns. You may think you'll be a natural, but take it from me, you're going to be facing all kinds of twists and turns, navigating unknown territory and getting lost on the way for the rest of your life, and you're probably not going to ask for advice or help. Today of course we have technology that helps us avoid getting lost, stuck in traffic or arriving late. Sat Navs and smart phones get us where we need to go whether it be by car, bike or foot. It seems we men are cool to ask technology for help but not oneanother. The same is true of fatherhood. The directions are out there on the world wide web. You have access to blogs and forums for dads (I admit to also using forums for mums) that can advise on everything from how to change a nappy to preparing healthy food. I can thank mumsnet for teaching me how to carve a halloween pumpkin. I did a brilliant job firt time around. My son loved it and I only had to buy one big orange vegetable from the local store. My experience of fitting a boil and bite mouthguard for rugby? Now that's a different and expensive story, and all because I didn't seek help online. Ask, and you will receive. And you won't get so lost along the way.
